It's not here or there; it's here and there

After spending two months in Taiwan I came to realize that I had been asking the wrong question all along! The right question to ask is not here or there but here and there. You see, I spent half of my life in Taiwan and half in the U.S. And for the past twenty years no matter how much "positive thinking" and meditation I did I felt there was something missing in my life; I felt incomplete and torn. I felt I had to choose between becoming an American or a Chinese.

The "Aha Moment" came when I attended my first grade school reunion, after being graduated for 44 years! I saw 30-40 classmates from the Air Force Children's Primary School, Xinzhu Taiwan. I couldn't remember most of their names but the faces I recognized instantly and the memories washed over me like a tsunami. The boy I had the hots for, the "not-so-bright" kids I protected from the bullies because I had privileges as the teacher's pet and a "good" student, the cute girl I secretly envied. But the Aha Moment came when some of them, like myself, live in the U.S. but spend half of the year in Taiwan! Why didn't I think of it?!

I'm sure you can relate to this even if you never left the U.S. You grew up in the East, South or the MidWest and now you live in the PNW: You spend your youth running as far away from your first "home", you worked hard during your 30s & 40s trying to prove that you were "somebody", independent and different from your parents, now in your 50s you wonder why, like the salmons, you are propelled by this mysterious and irresistible urge to swim back to the place where you were born, so that life goes on when your decomposed body becomes food for the river and the forest.

Just some random thoughts, probably incoherent as I just landed two nights ago. I'm still under the cultural shock of how quiet and green it is here. Good to be back and writing again.